Flashback - The Choice

My first quarter just got over. It's funny how when you are studying hard for an exam, your mind wanders to what you should be doing. Mine went overboard, started thinking of going cycling, riding horses, playing the guitar... yea, a lot of all that. All the exams had to do was end, and all of that pretty much died down. Natural death and all.

But there was one thing that stuck - write a PGSEM diary. Nobody here knows about the PGSEM, apparently people dont think it has much of a value. A part-time course they said, nobody in their right minds would choose that they said. Do I want to glorify the PGSEM course? Nopes! I'd rather advocate that people go and join a full-time course with no other distractions (no office work, no overtime, no home work.. basically no work! ) and slog through the duration and come out a spiffy new manager.

But not everyone can just leave everything and join a management course. Some can not. Some dont want to. I didnt want to. I am more the... what would you call it... techie types. Give me bits and bytes and I'll juggle them all day. But I want to "do something", and I dont want to plunge head-first without knowing how to handle it all. Yes, give me a PC and I'll get started... but all code and no business makes Jack an idiot, or helpless at the least.

• Do I want to start an enterprise, but am not sure how... maybe.
• Do I think I'm not leading my team well in my company, and wish I had the know-how... maybe.
• Do I think I deserve more, and my company isnt giving me the chance because I dont have the required skill set... maybe.

Does this sound familiar to you? Probably, yes.

There's a huge gap between aspiration and the choice. My choice came about in a wierd way. I had this competition with someone, where in I said that I'd get better marks in CAT by studying for under a month, when this person had been studying for a year. I was scoffed at, but I was looking for a challenge.. and this seemed like fun. Solving puzzle, reading and understanding something, yea.. didnt sound like rocket science. At the time.

Anyway, while filling out my application, I marked all the PGP slots as a normal person would. But when I reached the Bangalore section, there was an added slot for PGSEM. Now, a friend had told me about the course, so I was vaguely intrigued by it. I looked it up... a few blogs here, the PGSEMInfo group there. It appeared to be tailor-made for someone who wanted to hold it all - work, family, study. Only if he thought he could go through with it. It seemed perfect! I wanted to know the fundamentals of managing an enterprise. Yea, I could always find someone who really IS interested in management, and let him handle the business side of the company. But I dont want to be illiterate when it comes to understanding it, I should atleast know the basics.

Now since I was writing the CAT anyway, I figured why not... why waste this opportunity in a competition, you actually have a goal now for the CAT. Will help you prepare better. Besides, this would let me know how I stand against the rest of the population. If I dont get a good score, I'd know what my weak points are. I can then write the PGSEM test in February (It was August I think at the time). You see, there were three tests to write to be eligible to enter the PGSEM course: The CAT - the mother of all filtering tests, the GMAT - The mother of all filtering tests internationally, and the PGSEM entrance test - The modest, silent killer.

• You got flogged in the CAT, competing against 2.75 lakh people is no joke. Your percentile varies by a mile for each wrong answer.
• The GMAT was apparently quite merciless itself - We're Indians, Quant is a walkthrough for us. But Verbal, sigh. People howled when they saw their verbal scores go for a toss "But Barrons/Kaplan/Princeton said this was right! What the $%#@!".
• The PGSEM entrance test - approximately 5000 people. A forgiving filtering scheme you think. 400 out of these guys get shortlisted. Hell, no! On the flip side, you dont get to know what your scores were... did u lose on verbal, or was it di? Was it the essay?? It's just an acceptance mail if you got through.

So I merrily ticked the option for PGSEM, alongside PGP. Left out the "other colleges", I figured why bother, you're only interested in the PGSEM, not like you're going to let go of your office tag and grab some books fulltime. Sent the application form.

And that's when the nightmare began.